Recovery is life

Before you start recovery its always hard to believe that its possible and its so difficult to see all the benefits that recovery would bring you. but my god, believe me when i say this, recovery is worth it. when you have an eating disorder you are not living, you are dying from your illness. its hard to ever imagine that you will have a life again, that you will be able to go a whole day without hearing the voices in your head, or being put down whenever you try and stand up. but its possible, im living proof of that and so are millions of others world wide, recovery is possible. im not fully recovered yet and i know that and i can accept that but i know i will get there, recovery has taught me that. i can live again, i go out with my friends, i socialise with my family and they can actually talk to me about something other than the worry im causing them. my illness always told me that people wouldnt care about me if i was recovered but i was so wrong, its just that people d

Well I was first an outpatient with CAMHS i.e the worst place on earth filled with mentally numb humans thinking they know best. I was there about 4 times a week and each time all they did was weigh me and send me over to the hospital for an ecg and blood tests and blablabla they are awful basically. So anyway, they repeatidly threatened me with a mental health unit but i kinda just pushed it away thinkkng it would never happen, so my weight kept dropping and i wasnt trying at recovery so they made a refferal, long story short i ende up in an adolescent mental health ward called Junction 17 in prestwhich, bloody terrifying. I got admitted about 8oclock at night and i never ever left my house like i turned into some miserable person who wouldnt speak to her friends and spent all her time with her mum. (Aka bestfriend, oh and my dad) so i then had tto move into this room that was suprisingly lovely (heated flooring, heaven for me who is always freezing) and spend every moment alone, w

oh the dreaded word, meal plan. for anyone that doesn't know what a meal plan is then let me explain it to you, you basically have to eat around 6 times a day, breakfast, morning snack, lunch, afternoon snack, tea and supper. When you're in hospital well in my case its certain foods, if you wanted a chocolate bar you couldn't have one, you had to have what was on the snack list, which was awful. like so bland, like a cup of milk, i don't like milk. but when you are at home and recovering the meal plans are so much more flexible, you can pick your own snacks and everything and its just so much more freeing! meal plans move up in calories (eugh i hate that word), you start off on a starter meal plan, which is basically designed to avoid re-feeding syndrome. its tiny amounts of food little and often, which is terrifying for someone just starting recovery. when you move on with recovery it becomes a lot easier, your meal plans become increased or decreased due to how

I guess it's fairly important that I explain my story to you. At the age of 17 years old I was diagnosed with Anorexia, Anxiety, Depression and OCD. First came depression. It was around the time of my birthday (10th june for anyone interested) and I literally just could not shift this bad mood, I was snappy, rude and basically devastated on a daily basis. My friends were calling me boring and saying I wasn't my usual hyper and bubbly self, so my mum being the amazing mum that she is decided enough was enough and took me to the doctors. They were very quick to diagnose me with depression, but there was another underlying problem, I had been making myself sick due to extreme dieting. Nobody knew about this and I was very good at hiding it, I started dieting due to some comments that were made about my appearance by some guys. (Stupid I know, boys pfft.) I tried every type of diet under the sun, I literally lived on google trying to find quick ways to lose weight but little

My name is Sydney Cooper and I want to help everyone to a happier and healthier life! Thought I'd give you a little introduction to myself. I am totally new to this whole blogging malarky so please excuse my awfulness. I've been wanting to start a blog for so long now and I thought now is the time to do so, I basically want to write about my recovery and the obstacles I am overcoming in my journey to recovery. I see so many instagram accounts and blogs from girls in recovery from anorexia and they are so inspirational so I thought I'd get out my laptop and set out on creating a lovely blog! I hope my words can inspire and educate all my lovely readers, also giving me a little entertainment and something to keep my mind busy, enjoy!