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overcoming calorie counting

i receive alot of questions and queries daily about how to stop calorie counting. and yes its one of the hardest things to get yourself out of.
i did struggle with this. because being ill i spent alot of my free time in supermarkets revising nutrition labels and ingredients (sad i know right) but thats what i did to make sure i knew exactly what i was eating. which was hell.
and now i dont even look at labels, i eat the food thats put in front of me, i pick food from a menu without giving the 'light bites' menu a second glance and i do that without a care in the world.

and it wasnt easy to get here but it isnt impossible.
okay so even when i left inpatient i was still calorie counting, not as bad but i was still doing it.
and i just had enough like many of you, my brain was exhausted, it was constantly on the go just overthinking everything and i didnt need it on top of everything else.

so when i decided to stop it was nearing up to christmas time and we had endless tubs of heroes, celebrations and roses and this was p.e.r.f.e.c.t.
so every night, after having my usual meals and snacks, id have my nightsnack and about 15 minutes later i would be starving, so to conquer this 'going over my calories' id have 2 heroes. my favourites, (galaxy caramel and malteasers for anyone thats interested)
i know its not much but it really just showed me that i could do it and my body or life wouldnt change. it helped me build my confidence. sure i used to cry through it but soon i was having like 5 or more without a care.
so then i took it to the next step, the measuring, i poured my cereal freely, added as much milk as i liked and throughout the day i had whatever i wanted. because i wasnt measuring my intake i couldnt calculate my calories. with the help of my dad (who legit had enough of anorexia taking his daughter) he went round with sticky labels and put them over every food package in the house. which isnt a necessary step but whatever you feel will help you.. DO IT!
 i also struggled with buying shop bought lunches, which meant anywhere i went during the day i had to take a packed lunch which was such a bore.. so i walked into morrisons put my thumb over any labels and picked what i wanted. not what anorexia wanted. what sydney wanted.

and it worked. all this freedom around food really helped me relax and just enjoy what i was eating.
like this sounds simple but you do have to battle your demons along the way but you can do it. everyone has their own way to overcome things and its just finding somethings thats right for you. but from this point onwards, food labels are banned. you arent allowed to look at them, youre just harming your own mental state.
now like 6 months on i eat what i want, let others prepare my food and im so beyond happy..

thats another thing, your food.
okay so if youre somebody who prepares their own food, small portions and low calorie foods, you need to change that.
you need to let somebody else make your food (now im not saying to never step foot in the picture ever again because cooking is therapeutic and fabulous) you just need to give someone else the control until youre comfortable around not having everything weighed out and picking your own food (such as healthy low fat products, because you need normality). my mum now cooks my meals, still. i can cook of course and i love cooking but my entire life has been spent with my mum cooking dinner for my family and we all eat the same together, and thats what is normal too me. so thats what happens everyday. if my mum wants me to cook then i do. life of a 19 year old ay.

its okay to struggle, youre not expected to be perfect at everything.
calorie counting is obsessive and it stays with you for a long time, but its possible to overcome it and you can. plan it, find ways that work for you, add in extras, get rid of your measuring jugs and weighing scales and it whatever you want!! you want another snack, have one! you want some extra pasta or chicken then you have it!! get rid of the numbers, food is fuel, its energy and protein and it keeps you alive and looking vibrant and beautiful. stop looking at food like its going to harm you, its not.
its a blessing.

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